This Super Bowl turned into a better game than I thought it would be, what with John Madden getting friendly with Laura Bush. Actually, maybe George enjoyed it more.
Getting down to the Prayin’
I don’t know which way to interpret this tepid worshippin’ of our lord and his invisible hand helping the players run and catch and stuff. A measly 8 shows of affection to the ultimate scoring machine! I have a few ideas to postulate, so let me know if any of them ring true (or close):
There wasn’t very much worshipin’ of raptor jeezus because:
- Everybody had their minds on playing a professional football game in front of a packed stadium with every action broadcast across the world. That’s enough to make my penis shrink up. It might be enough to keep players from exerting the effort and embarrassment required to make an outward and fictitious show of faith.
- God didn’t care for the petty show of gratitude from short-lived meat puppets that inhabit his giant ball o’ fun and forced them to not make the effort. Those who did will burn in hell.
- God wanted every player to make some outward sign of their faith, but most didn’t because THE DEBBIL MADE ‘EM NOT DO IT. They will all burn in hell. Because he a merciful lord.
My money’s on #1.