Superbowl Sunday

Well, it’s Sunday, the day of American Exceptionalism where we show the world that we have the best America Rules football team in the world (even though no team outside the US has played against any domestic team and despite the fact that American football is despised over most of the world). This is the day that players from each team will thank god for allowing them to have the advantage over their, presumably less worthy, opponent on the gridiron field of battle.

I will be watching the game tonight on my big screen, and I intend to count the number of times a player thanks some invisible deity above (it seems that they always point to the sky). I imagine a drinking game could be conjured around a shot if a player thanks god for a Field Goal, a swig of beer for thanking for a completed pass or other non-point scoring play, and both for a touchdown. At the end of the game, you will have to french kiss a member of your same sex the number of times that a deity is thanked for the win. It won’t matter whether or not you want to become that intimate, since by that point in the game, if you follow these rules, you will be too drunk to remember.

I’ll report the number of times a deity was thanked tomorrow, unless I pass out before the game is over. I don’t plan on recording it. I’m just not that interested.

Update:

Here are the scores:

References to god     Occasion
——————     ———
3                                  touchdown
2                                  reception
1                                  QB
2                                  winner (postgame)

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About 330M Administrator

Skeptic, Humanist, Freethinker, Atheist
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